Insecurity and the Mall Make-up gal!
I use to believe the girls in the fancy boutiques who would tell me “that outfit” looked so good on me. Or the new hairstylist who said, “oh yeah you need to do your hair this way, it frames your face” when inside, I didn’t agree, but I was so insecure that I thought “well they must know better than me”
I actually thought a random person knew better than me about how I felt I looked.
That’s called deep insecurity.
Why would I care what someone else thinks? If I feel pretty, shouldn’t that be all that matters? Oh yeah, people pleasing combined with deep insecurity.
But tonight I had a victory, and I love those little victories between us and the Lord. Our Heavenly Daddy loves seeing His kids get free from all wrong thinking, even if it is one little victory at a time. He sent His son so we would be free!
Tonight I was walking through Macy’s trying to get to the parking lot and out of nowhere a girl confidently asked me, “can I show you something”? Usually I am pretty good at being kind and buzzing right by, but this girl had some solid sales skills and before I knew it she was telling me about my eyebrows and painting something on them. I couldn’t get a word in to tell her I had no money and no intention of buying this product. After she was done, she led me to the mirror and I exclaimed “oh no no no, no girl, I don’t do my eyebrows like that, you are sweet, but no, that is not cute” I couldn’t even pretend, it looked scary.
Now as a recovering people pleaser, that was a victory. Yes believe it or not. As an insecure girl who hated herself for years and hated even more the way she looked (talking about me here) that was a HUGE VICTORY. But even after my horror, the make-up sales ninja said “oh I think it looks great on you” those dreaded words that want to creep in and try to manipulate you. But this time I was like “oh no, honey, that doesn’t look good on me, oh wow, no”
As I continued through the store, I kept passing mirrors and glancing over at my new, extra long, slightly scary eyebrows and smiling that THIS TIME, I won. This time I realized that I knew better than the random person. This time I had enough confidence to know what looks good on me and what doesn’t. This time, I remembered that everything that anyone says to me is for MY CONSIDERATION and I considered that make-up tip a nono. And I knew it was a victory over my past insecure thinking.
I use to listen to what EVERYONE said about me, good, bad or ugly and believe it. And let me tell you, that was exhausting.
It’s exhausting to listen to people’s opinions and try to figure out who is right and who is wrong, I would tend to take in what people said as truth, no matter what they said. I never knew until about a year ago that everything anyone said, was for me to consider. That honestly changed my world. I got to choose whether I agreed with you or kindly didn’t agree with you.
The love of the Heavenly Father is so real and tangible, it is for us to walk in every moment of the day, the question becomes do we believe about ourselves what our Heavenly Father says about us? Or do we believe what others say about us?
I have an idea, I did this a few years ago and it was really really amazing. I want to challenge you to do it too.
Sit down and write a Love Letter from God to you. I am serious. Share with me if you want too. I will feature some on my facebook page. Or not. You don’t have to share it with anyone if you don’t want too.
But definitely do it.
When I did it, I was pretty new to my relationship with God and I didn’t really know what God said about me, so I went to His Word. It was so fun and exhilarating to search His scriptures with the help of good old google to see just what the Father says about His children, about me!
Thanks Jan (my first mentor) for having me do this, it was awesome and so are you.
Biggest Hugs Everyone,
Let’s conquer insecurity so we are not talked into things we aren’t sure we want in life.